The one with the conflict (updated in memory of Sam Yates)

I stood at the crossing- coat zipped, hood up, headphones on - staring straight through the traffic that passed by at speed.  Each car came with a gust of wind that blew cold into my face, but still I stood, perfectly motionless, eyes fixed firmly on the other side, where my journey would soon continue.

I thought I heard God. Nothing loud. Nothing clear.  But a tiny, quiet whisper, almost drowned out with the noise of the traffic.

'What if the blur that stood between you and your fixed destination mattered to me?'  I thought of the people in the cars, heading out to collect the kids from school, going to the shops, carrying out their work, visiting friends.

Waiting for the lights to change, I thought: Was God reminding me that there was a hurting world out there, that can so often be forgotten about as we focus on our own plans and purpose? Had I become a bit preoccupied with my own desires at the expense of those around me? We are told to go into the world, make disciples, teach, correct, love and serve others - had I lost sight of this?

The lights remained the same. My thoughts concerned me. Had my life become too much about me?

And still I stood, staring into the distance. And then I thought I heard God. Nothing loud. Nothing clear. But a tiny, quiet whisper, almost drowned out with the noise of the traffic.

'What if the blur that stood between you and your fixed destination remained firm in my hands and would continue without you?' I thought of the people in the cars and their determination to arrive at their own destination, whatever that may be. And the likelihood of this happening without me interfering.

Still waiting for the lights to change, I thought: Was God reminding me that He is in control, not me.  Had I become a bit too preoccupied with what goes on around me - in my family, in church, in the community - at the expense of taking time out and enjoying God's presence?  Even Jesus at times withdrew from 'stuff' to spend time with his Father.

The lights remained the same. And again, my thoughts concerned me. Had my life become too much about my 'doing' - my involvement in what goes on around me?

The lights changed and I continued my journey.  Confusion!  Had God spoken to me?  Had he dropped a few simple thoughts into my mind and heart to teach, challenge and develop me?  I want to say 'yes' - but would that be foolish?  After all they seem to be in conflict with each other! Could God be nudging me to focus more on those around me AND take more time out to spend with him?

God's Word is a lamp to our feet and a light to our path and yet it seems to illuminate two different directions!  How can I walk both paths at once?

Bewilderment.
 

* Sunday night I experienced the same. A pulling in two different directions. Unsure which way to turn.

I should pray for God's will.  'Your Kingdom come, your will be done ...'  He sees the big picture, of course I should pray for God to have his way, his will, to do what he wants in the situation. For his plan and purpose to be fulfilled.

But I wanted him to hear my heart's desire and that of so many others. That is okay isn't it?  'Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart'  Please God, please.

But what if, on this occasion, these two approaches weren't in harmony? What if God's will and my desire were in conflict with each other? What then?

Could I be so bold as to focus on the story of the persistent widow and try to 'change' God's mind?  God, I really want this to happen. You can do it. You can perform a miracle. You can restore health. You are a powerful and loving God. Surely you hear the cries of our heart?

Frustration, disappointment, pain, anger ... but deep down, the underlying truth is that I know God knows best.

What can we do when we are caught in the middle of a laser show with lights directing us in many different directions?  I don't have the answer. I struggle with it. I can see 'A' makes sense - I can see 'B' makes sense.  Neither go directly against scripture and both seem right.

But I do believe that God directs the path of the righteous and to me that speaks of movement. A path goes somewhere. So, I guess the only wisdom I can offer in situations like these is to pick a path and see where it takes you and trust that God will direct each step until you are walking in his perfect plan for your life.

Sometimes it is true that both or all directions are right, it's just a matter of balance and keeping God involved and being prepared to change direction when he tells us to! Maybe that is what God was saying to me at the crossing?


And perhaps on Sunday night it was more about being persistent in prayer, in dwelling with the Creator God, than choosing the 'correct' approach? I will still pray and I will still believe!


* That Sunday we prayed for a beautiful young woman and much loved friend Sam Yates to receive a miracle in the form of new lungs. Sadly, this didn't happen and on the 14th April 2013 Sam lost her battle with Cystic Fibrosis. Beautiful Sam is now breathing easy, and dancing around in the presence of her Saviour Jesus. Whilst she is and always will be so incredibly missed, we still have to believe that God knows best. This is hard. But the legacy that Sam left will change lives here on earth. She fought hard and selflessly to raise awareness of organ donation, in order to significantly increase the life span and quality of others. Two years on and that legacy still continues in many different ways - (one of which is a short documentary called 'A Love Worth Giving' directed by James Newton - please check it out - https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/jamesnewton/a-love-worth-giving )

She really was a unique individual whose short life will always impact this world! Help raise organ donation awareness - sign the register and speak to your loved ones about it.

Sam, your love, your trust in Jesus, and your passion for life has and always will be an inspiration xx

The one with where Twitter triumphs

I just wasn't interested.  It seemed pointless.  An unnecessary use of my time and effort.  I didn't understand the fascination or its purpose.  I steered clear.

Facebook was all I needed.  I had friends there, friends in real life. Why would I need anything else?

Then I opened up a Twitter account, and slowly the bug got me!

All was good at first.  I had Facebook to keep up with my friends from across the world, to share photos, arrange tea dates, and generally catch up on life with - and I had Twitter for networking, meeting new people and gaining a better understanding of a myriad of interesting and diverse subjects!  A perfect combination: Facebook and Twitter.

But recently I have noticed that Twitter is beginning to take priority over Facebook.  My number of 'followers' outweighs my 'friends' and status updates on the two platforms sit at around 30:1 - in favour of Twitter!  I am often interacting on Twitter whilst Facebook lays dormant in the background. Twitter has captured my attention to the detriment of Facebook and has won a battle I hadn't even realised existed!

To my Facebook friends - I am sorry!  I still love you, and am keen to share life with you.  Things will change and we will once again share funny, inspirational, challenging and sometimes just plain ridiculous status' and wall posts.








To my Twitter followers - thank you for welcoming me, interacting with me, challenging me, correcting me, enlightening me, introducing me .... the list goes on and long may it continue.  I appreciate you!






And with that I could end ... but, in typical 'Jo' style, this experience has caused me to reflect on something similar that may happen in a different context.



Are we in danger of doing the same thing in our churches?

• Can we be so passionate and excited to see new people come to church that we begin to forget the faithful members who come week in week out?

• Can we be so keen to welcome visitors and guests that regulars leave the building questioning their visibility and even their worth?

• Can we turn all our focus on extending the Kingdom numerically that we neglect to build it spiritually?

I don't throw out these questions without thought.  They are questions that have been on my heart and mind for quite a while now.  I want to get it right.  But how?  Is it really possible to embrace the 'old' and the 'new' equally?

I suggest the answer can be found in balance and team work.

We need to get the balance right. We need to identify the three different groups of people that are likely to be in our church:  Long-term regular members, those that have been on the fringe for a while, and first time guests.  All are important and need to know the love of Jesus in their lives.  All of them.  If one person leaves the building on a Sunday morning without feeling cared about and significant then I think we have failed.  God does not show favouritism and neither should we. 

Once we have identified the different groups of people in church, we can then work together to ensure each group are cared for.  Some churches will develop a strategy for this - and this can be a tremendous help - but I don't think it should be the responsibility of just a few people on a particular team.  We are all called to love everyone, and I therefore believe each person should take responsibility here.  We need to remove our blinkers, put down our agendas, break out of cliques and walk across the room!

I know we don't all find this easy.  Sure, we are not all confident extroverts, but I don't think this is a justifiable excuse to exclude people.  If you step out of your comfort zone, put your trust in God, and talk to just one person, you could make such a difference.  On the other hand, if you are gifted at welcoming people and putting them at ease, then get out there and help the less confident people out.  Share the load according to personalities and gifts!

Everyone deserves to be acknowledged, given value to, and embraced with the love of Jesus.  Let us work together to ensure that each person that walks through our doors experiences this - regardless of whether they are apprehensively showing their face for the first time or if they have been so often they are almost part of the furniture!


Following the Twitter and Facebook example above - I should perhaps use this as an opportunity to apologise to those whom my behaviour at times has contributed to feelings of exclusion at church. I am sorry.  I know I am not anywhere near getting this balance right yet, but I am trying.  Let's not dwell on the past - but learn together and move on.  Are you with me?


And now - I will make sure I post this on Facebook and not just on Twitter!! 

Does love always give out?

I love a good discussion.   An exchange of views with an aftertaste that encourages action.  Ideas that dance around the table; theology and praxis in perfect partnership.

Over coffee today this happened.  Three of us chatted, shared thoughts, questioned ... until the conversation drew to a close with the call back to work.  I now find myself left with the cold remains of a latte, and the need to pursue the thoughts further.  Perhaps this is the place for this?  Maybe you can add something different, something unique to the mix that generates a more complete perspective, resulting in a more Christ-like response.

I could lean on Kolb and take the experience around his cycle to find an answer - but I would rather ask you what you think ... and we will work it out from there.  Much more friendly this way isn't it?

The 'Concrete Experience'?

For the last few weeks, a man has come into our church, before the service, asking for a bag of food.  His appearance is 'tatty' and he is in need of a good wash.  Not much is known about him, although it is clear that he is not new to the area, or, it seems, to the situation he finds himself in.  Each week he is offered coffee whilst a food bag is made up for him.  He drinks the coffee, engages in a small amount of conversation, takes the bag, and leaves.

We are able to make up a food bag for him out of the food that is donated for a charity that has its base in our church.  However, this food is really already accounted for, and ready to give out to other people in the area that are in need.

We are also involved in the Food Bank that is about to open up in the area, so have food being collected for this as well.

The problem is, neither of these charities work by giving people that just walk in food.  They are recommended by and then looked after by various services.

When we give away their food, we are, in effect, stealing from them.  We are robbing from Peter to pay Paul.  This situation may continue.  What should we do?


Reflections

• Does supplying this man with a bag of food really meet his needs?

• Are we helping him to find a more sustainable way to live?

• Do our actions encourage him to find life to the full in a relationship with Jesus?  Perhaps he already has this?

• Does providing him with food result in him having money to spend on activities or substances that we may not be in favour of?  Do we have a right to judge this?

• When we hand out food - is that our 'job done' or is there more to it?

• What if, by continually giving out food in this way, we find ourselves in a situation in which we are no longer able to supply food to those with an identified genuine need?

Dare I ask it, if we continue to provide a bag of food each week are we showing the love of Jesus or do we risk being taken advantage of?  What if 'the word on the street' is that free food is given out without question and the demand becomes greater than the supply?  What if it doesn't stop with food?

What then should we do with this:

'Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back.' (Luke 6:30)

Or this:

'I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.'  (Matthew 10:16)
  
What is the relationship between love and wisdom in this situation?

Is love always the trump card?  



What do you think?